Love is Blind

I reached into the plastic bag and pulled out the box; I looked at him and he looked at me and then we both looked at the box. I gave a subtle gesture that told him I was ready, I headed down the hall and he followed. I turned the corner and stood in the doorway; we met eyes and kissed briefly, the anxiety was too strong. I walked in, grabbed them from the box, sat down and did my business. I waited just a few minutes and then I picked it up; I looked down into my hand and I saw two faint pink lines, my heart stopped… I was with Child. I sat there on the seat cover and placed my hand to my stomach, I looked down and pictured the miniscule human that was growing inside me, I held tighter. I looked over to the door and remembered who was waiting for me and for the news. I slowly stood up and made my way to and out the door; he was waiting there anxiously with his head down to his knees and with his hands squeezed onto his rosemary. He kept his position but lifted his head slightly; I leaned on the side of the door, looked at him and let out a sigh; He seemed confused and he stood up on his feet, I approached him and said, “I’m not sure…” He kept his worried face and seemed displeased. I continued and said “I’m not sure because the lines are so light, but...I do see two lines, not one” His expression went to a careful excitement, he asked to see it. He looked at them and was immediately convinced it was an accurate test, he started putting together earlier symptoms and explained how they were further proof that I was indeed, pregnant. After all the brief excitement of trying to figure out the yeses and no’s we stopped and looked at each other, shared a moment of several expressions of happiness, relief, calamity, and love. We rushed our bodies into each other and clamped our arms so tight; we didn’t move or speak for few seconds, we then exchanged sympathy kisses and words of encouragement. We separated our bodies but kept our hands linked, we made our way to the living room while speaking about how surreal it all was and how blessed we were to have been given a second chance at parenthood after loosing our first son sooner then he was able to enter the world. I walked over to the couch and laid down… I looked out into space, I imagined what the baby was doing right then. I knew the baby was nothing more then large group of cells, but that intrigued me more. I was lying there and there were cells inside of me that consisted of both mine and his DNA and it was busy creating a child, our child! I loved my baby from the minute I knew it existed, I didn’t care what it looked like, how far developed it was, whether it was a girl or boy… it was mine, the baby was mine and was inside me; I was its home and shelter. From my body it would feed and sleep and move, and I knew my job was to nurture it even from a distance. My miracle was just placed in my stomach and although I knew nothing about its unique characteristics, I knew I loved it; it was my son or daughter and I felt a sense of completeness. I continued rubbing my stomach and I thanked god for this gift, to be blessed with a chance at motherhood, to be everything to such a tiny human. At that moment I vowed to never take a moment for granted that I was given with my child, I would give it all the love I could give and keep it safe from the dangers of the world… I would hold it to my heart and dry its every tear. I would show it to be strong and to be brave… teach it that life will be harsh but we must fight it with love and faith in the father. I loved my daughter before I could even feel her; she is my life, my world, and the greatest thing I have come to achieve in my life thus far.